


addicted to the numb, livin’ in the cold

by thor_odinson



Category: RWBY
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Gen, Grief, Hurt but no comfort, Pain, actually idk if this is pain enough but, p a i n, yk I tried
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:27:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24296587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thor_odinson/pseuds/thor_odinson
Summary: Qrow wants to be home. James tells him he isn’t his.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	addicted to the numb, livin’ in the cold

“You were never home.”

Qrow feels his heart shatter. He watches James turn and walk away. His hands fist; he feels his nails dig into his skin. His lip trembles,  _ you were never home _ echoing in James’ voice in his head. He tries to walk back home, but his legs don’t move. He tries to sit on the nearby wall, but his feet don’t turn. He stands on the street for hours and hours on end, fists clenched, teeth drawing blood from his lips in an effort not to cry, never finding the energy to get his legs to work. 

The sun starts to set; pinks and yellows and oranges show but Qrow doesn’t feel the peace he always used to feel. Qrow doesn’t feel  _ anything  _ apart from his heart thumping in his chest, begging to be set free to run after its soulmate. 

_ Soulmate _ . What a word. Qrow can’t help but laugh bitterly. He’d thought James was his soulmate, and before that Taiyang, but it seemed neither of them reciprocated. Tai was looking for something casual and James had just  _ used  _ him. 

Maybe he’s just destined to be alone. 

He’s shaken out of his thoughts when he catches someone staring at him as they walk by. They have every right to: he knows he probably looks a mess. He brings a hand to his lips; the side of his finger comes back crimson. He knows he needs to go home and he also knows that the minute he sets foot in the building, it’s going to kill him. It’s not  _ their  _ house anymore. It’s  _ his _ . He doesn’t know how to deal with that. 

And then he starts to feel faint. His head starts to spin and he loses his balance, almost falling face flat onto the pavement in front of him. When was the time he’d last eaten? How long has he been on his feet? He doesn’t remember and he needs to  _ move _ . 

He doesn’t know how he’d done it but the next thing he registers is reaching into his pocket for his keys. James’ photo looks up at him, and his eyes start to burn. He yanks at the keyring and twists it loose, and when it’s free he throws it behind him into the road. He doesn’t look back to check but he swears he hears the clunk of wheels speeding over metal.

Once inside, he slams the door. Instantly he screws his eyes shut, everything immediately reminding him of James. His coat is still on the hook, his jumper slung over the stair rail. His shoes sit innocently by the backyard door. Everywhere Qrow looks, James glares back at him,  _ you were never home  _ flashing on every surface. 

Qrow slumps against the nearest wall, sliding himself to the floor and slamming his head onto his knees. The throbbing in his forehead is a welcome change from the pounding in his chest. James’ wicked grin fills his thoughts and Qrow finally lets out a strained sob. 

The tears don’t seem to stop, not after soaking his trouser legs or after he needs to heave in breath after breath. The tears don’t stop; his hands shake and his face tingles and the yells rip themselves from his lungs, and the tears are relentless. 

They don’t stop for hours, or days, or weeks, and in the midst of it all, Qrow can’t help but wonder.

Will he ever be home?


End file.
